I had my first ever pap smear test scheduled at Kalasatama terveysasema upon turning 25 yo. I had never experienced this test before and had no idea what to expect.
I was met by a nurse who refused to speak English, I had no one to translate and I had no idea what was going on. With the little Finnish I understood, she gestured to take my underwear off and positioned me on the stand with my legs spread open. Obviously in a very vulnerable position and without any context of what was going on, I was very tense and didn’t understand what the procedure will be like.
Without a warning, without any kind of indication that she was going to insert the instrument inside me (so I could relax my body), she proceeded to forcefully insert it, causing me the worst pain I have ever experienced in my life. It was so sudden, I lost my ability to see for a second.
The nurse dismissed me when I screamed in pain and started to cry uncontrollably. Blood on the floor everywhere. She gave me a pad and told me to walk it off (something in the lines of “ei se mitään”) and that this is normal.
I bled for weeks…And never want to experience a pap smear test again.